Remember

Sometimes you get reminded of that feeling of complete and total love that you have for someone. It's easy to forget when you spend every day together. Or maybe it's not forgetting, but getting used to it so you just don't notice it as much. I've had a couple recent reminders of that feeling this past week. Today I met Jake for lunch and we went to this lovely Thai place. I picked him up downtown at work and then dropped him off again. Lunch was nice (we met up with his sisters, Sara and Kazia,) but it was afterwards that I was struck with that feeling. We embraced and said goodbye after exchanging details of when we'd see each other again, and as I pulled away, we waved to each other, and then I watched him walk down the street. While waiting at the light, I was reminded of my love for this man! And as I turned the corner and drove away I was struck by how much I missed him! I wanted to turn around and go back, kidnap him from work, and disappear for the week together. I didn't even say I love you before I walked away.

I had another experience on Saturday. He had been gone to Canada for work since Monday and I left Friday for Youth Conference with my ward. We missed each other by just a few hours. Youth Conference was wonderful and I was surprised by how much I enjoyed myself despite only knowing a few people a very little prior to leaving. It was a spiritual experience and I was reminded of many important things like what I felt like as a teenager, what experiences were important to me, how my testimony was shaped and molded, how lucky I am to have a mom who taught me how to do EVERYTHING, the importance of preparing ourselves every day for what may come, and the goodness of people. I enjoyed the opportunity to lift where I stood, which was more about people than projects.

Jake was going to meet us at the church where we were going to play games, have dinner, and end with a quick devotional. We returned a little earlier than we'd planned, so I was waiting for Jake to come and it was the longest 10 minutes of my life! Knowing I could see him at that moment, but being unable to. I think everyone noticed my longing looks down the road and my antsyness (is that a word) as I paced back and forth glancing at my phone every other minute. And they probably noticed my glow when we were together that night.

We're going through some big changes right now, and we've had our ups and downs, but I am still so in love and so grateful for every day we have together. It all makes the journey more deep and rich.

Anyway, I love you Jake! See you in a few hours..